A meditation to help you let go and embrace change

Explore this variant of the loving-kindness practice to cultivate more ease and openness in the moment-to-moment unfolding of life.

This is one of the hardest parts of life for me and I think for everyone I know it’s always changing— and sometimes in unpleasant, unpredictable and unplanned ways. And when these changes happen, things happen that we don’t want…someone we love dies do we have a gap or a divorce, perhaps an injury or illness to us or others, or even a layoff—then we struggle not only because of the pain of that loss, but also because of its surprise. Part of the reason for this frustration is that there is so little we can control.

One of the hardest parts of life for me, and I think for everyone I know, is that it is always changing – and sometimes in unpleasant, unpredictable and unplanned ways.

Everything is impermanent. It is constantly changing, converging and disintegrating. And it’s frustrating when we can’t do things our way. But paradoxically, when we can accept that it is not up to usand we stop trying to control what we can’t change or try to predict what we can’t foresee, then we can feel much calmer and more open to the unfolding of our lives from moment to moment. By embracing change, we can bring goodness into our experiences, even if they are sometimes painful and sad, and we can feel more at peace with life’s changes.

Key summaries

Adoption benefits:

• Reduces suffering caused by resistance to inevitable change
• Develops resilience for transition in life
• Develops psychological flexibility
• Creates space for new opportunities to emerge

Basic principles:

• Difference between acceptance and resignation
• Working with impermanence as a law of nature
• Cultivating an open attitude towards uncertainty
• The practice of letting go as an active, compassionate choice

Application: Especially helpful during major life transitions, losses, relationship changes, and when we are faced with situations beyond our control.

Guided Meditation: Letting Go and Embracing Change

1. First, find a place where you can just sit down and be still. Turn off your devices, close your eyes and just take a few breaths. Noticing your legs, your seat, your stomach. Bringing your attention to your forehead, your cheeks, your jaw, allowing the sound to enter your ears, allowing the taste to enter your mouth.
2. Place your hand on your stomach. Just notice how you feel your belly expand as you inhale and contract as you exhale.
3. Think of someone you know who is having a hard time right now. You can imagine that they are here with you, visualize them, or simply feel their presence. If you want, put your hand on your heart and silently offer them the following phrase: May you be at peace with the changes in life. Let the changes in life await you. Let the changes in life await you. By continuing to silently repeat this, it is as if you are giving a gift to this struggling being.
4. Note: Where is your focus? If you’ve lost contact with this struggling creature, reconnect, start over. Let the changes in life await you.
5. Let go of that connection with that other being. Notice your feet, feel your seat, relax your shoulder blades, pay attention to your breath, to the light coming through your eyelids.
6. Next, place your hand on your heart and connect with yourself. You can imagine that you are looking into a mirror, imagine yourself as a child, or simply connect with your beautiful presence. Give yourself the same wisdom: May I be at peace with life’s changes. And continue here for just a minute or two, giving yourself compassion and wisdom.
7. Notice where your attention is. If you’ve lost touch with yourself, carefully come back by reconnecting. May I be at peace with the changes in life. Just for one more minute, giving myself this grace. May I be at peace with the changes in life.
8. Keep this connection with you, and now include that first being and possibly everyone you know and love. May we be at peace with the changes in life. May we be at peace with the changes in life.
9. Expand the phrase to include all creatures. All living things in this ecosystem we call Earth. We all struggle with change, with loss, with constancy. Giving his wisdom, kindness and kind heart to all of us, including himself. May we all be at peace with the changes in life. Let everyone accept the changes in life with peace.
10. When you are ready, complete the meditation. You can end your practice by thanking yourself for your good intentions, for your beautiful heart, for this joyful effort.

Remember, you can practice this way if you need to. Stop, feel your feet, put your hand on your heart and say to yourself: May I be at peace with the changes in life. If you are struggling with an unexpected loss, be sure to be patient and be kind to yourself and reach out to your kind heart as often as possible.