If a narcissist is nice to you, it doesn’t mean they are nice to be real. A narcissist is a manipulative person with a selfish attitude.
If a narcissist is nice to you, it may not mean what you think. I’ll just be open. They probably don’t care about you as much as they say they do. There is usually an underlying reason for their good behavior that revolves around the selfish benefits of their actions. The pill is hard to swallow. I understand.
If a narcissist is nice to you, beware.
Narcissus can cause fear. And it is not always connected with physical fears. The level of manipulation that this toxic person uses can have devastating effects on your mental health and your future. So today we want to explore the real reason a narcissist plays the kindness card or chooses to use a facade to seduce you.
Here are a few reasons why a narcissist is good to you.
1. They get a narcissistic supply
Never forget that a narcissist must always have”supplies“. Their source of nourishment must be willing to pay attention to them and praise them for completing routine tasks. Otherwise, they break down.
A narcissus thrives on the devotion of others. So, if a narcissist is nice to you, it could be that he is doing it to keep his supply up. When they feel like you’re actually doing something for yourself, they go back to love bombing.
2. They ravish you with love
Speaking of love bombinghere’s another reason why a narcissist is nice to you. At first, this toxic person will shower you with gifts, compliments, and praise. They understand that in order to secure a narcissistic supply, they have to make you fall in love with them quickly. And when you do, they gradually decrease their positive behavior.
It’s called love bombing, and it’s sneaky.
3. “By the teeth” mentality.
This is when a narcissist does nice things to set you up for future guilt. What I mean by this is that they do thoughtful enough things for you that they can use it later in arguments.
A narcissist is notorious for bringing up things in the past that make them look good and things that make you look bad. If you do something to upset them or tell them no, they’ll say something like this:
“I’ve done all these nice things for you, and see how you repay me.”
Does this sound familiar?
4. They make you dependent on them
Narcissus is so cute to you they maintain control. For example, they might say
“You don’t have to work, I’ll take care of you”.
This is done to rob you of your independence, so it will be harder for you to leave them once you understand who they are. This is a calculated act that most narcissists plan from the start. This is often woven into the love bombing they use. And if you decide to let them take care of you, they rarely keep their promises.
5. They try to win you back
When a narcissist sees that you understood themthey do one or two things. Either they move on to another delivery or try to get you back. And when they try to win you back, they do it with more and more kind gestures.
While some people really want to change their relationship to make it work, a narcissist just wants to keep you around because you are usually very compassionate. Empathy is what a narcissist likes to feed on.
6. They want to be seen by others
One of the reasons narcissists are nice to you is because they want others to see what they are doing. To those who do not know the truth about them, they seem to be kind and considerate people.
As you can see, a narcissist can be kind, but he chooses to use kindness as another part of his business. To them, kindness is as fake as they are. Unless you live with a narcissist or live in the past, you cannot see how evil their actions are.
Why are they like that?
Narcissists lost their true identity at an early age. Because of various forms of abuse, these toxic people have come to think that manipulative and selfish behavior is normal. It is not so. They tend to be victims childhood neglector are subjected to verbal and mental abuse by their parents or other loved ones.
BUT, it is not your responsibility to fix them. Because, for one thing, it’s incredibly difficult to get them to seek therapy. They deny what they are doing and more than that, they claim you have a problem. They can also convince others that you have a problem too. So they can be dangerous people who can ruin your life.
And I know some of you really care about the narcissist. But if you don’t be careful with themtheir behavior can damage your self-esteem and your overall mental health and well-being. In some cases, these problems can cause health problems.
So maybe encourage them to seek help, but don’t let them change how they feel about themselves. Stay strong and run away from them if you have to.
Sending you all the love on your journey.
Staff writer in Training the mind
Sherry Heard is a professional writer and artist with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and multiple forms of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherry treats several mental illnesses, including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder. With this background and personal experience, she is committed to helping others overcome trauma and abuse, cope with mental illness, and heal over time.
